I Fought Sharia Law (And Sharia Law Won)

Hey there constituents!

How’s it going? We don’t get enough time to chat these days, do we? Lives can be so hectic, can’t they? Well, I really do hope we can keep in touch more from now on. It’s good to talk.

Now, there’s a lot of kerfuffle going on in Iran following their mock elections, isn’t there? The citizens got an outcome that they didn’t like, that looked vaguely rigged, so they’ve taken to the streets. How dare they? Don’t they believe those in charge? This sort of thing would never happen in Great Britain, and I’m very glad about that. We would just sit there, mumbling and grumbling, not doing anything about it while nothing improves and everything festers around us, as is the Great British way. I’m not saying that the New Labour government is festering, but their is a bit of a noxious whiff  emenating from somewhere in the cabinet. Not that I’m thinking of jumping ship or anything, just yet.

Iran is ruled under strict Sharia law. Not Sharia Twain, she don’t impress me much, nor Cheria Blair, although I’m sure as the Middle East Peace Envoy, her hubby and our saviour Tony Blair is there in the heat of the action, trying to smooth things over in his own inimitable way. The advocates of Sharia Law were helped into power in Iran by a CIA influenced overthrow, not a C&A influenced overthrow, although President Ahmadinnerjacket’s ubiquitous grey suit may well have fitted quite smartly in their summer range.

Hello, I'm Wearing A Snazzy Jacket

We are even lucky enough to have a smattering of Sharia Law courts on our own doorsteps. As our good Archbishop Rowan Williams says, “one law for everybody […] that’s a bit of a danger”, and isn’t about enforcing zealous religious extremism at all, no way baby Jesu! As Bob Dylan once stated, “Everybody must get stoned!”, so let’s draw a veil over the matter, before things go nuclear!

Archbishop Williams also recently said that criticising politicians for their expenses is a bit much, and could have grave consequences for democracy (rather than being the grave of democracy, as other filthy detractors have claimed!). I must say that he has my utmost support! Too right! What business is it of journalists to chastise politicians for making a few minor indiscretions with their finances? I am a thoroughly decent and upstanding person, if I don’t mind saying so myself, and those biscuit receipts were going to be paid back into the kitty once I broke into that twenty pound note. Trust me.

Be seeing you! Call me!

CJB

Tags: Archbishop, Blair, C&A, Cheria, CIA, detractors, Iran, nuclear, president, Rowan Williams, Shania, sharia, sharia law, veil